I find it both fascinating and hilarious the impact of those of whom you interact with on a daily basis eventually begin to impact you and how you operate. From both mannerisms that begin to become common place among groups to the language you use to communicate with others.
Example
Take for example language - the more effective examples of language and the impact that some language has where other examples fall flat. This is a great way to learn what does and doesn’t work while also striving to consume the leadership traits you find admiral.
Something I treasure is that those I interact with on a regular basis - whether directly or in passing - is that there is a large culture behind reading books. Leadership, productivity, down to even fun reads - reading has a place among those who want to stretch a different brain muscle.
Somewhere along the lines there is some book that talks about intent. I’m going to butcher the intent of that book soo hard because i’ve never read it nor can I even cite it as I don’t know the title/author. But oh boy has intent been a beacon in the ways I have been molding my delivery of communication over the last year. People around me starting communicating with intent and it caught my attention and interest - so naturally I caught the bug and started using it too.
Intent
I found intent to be a much more powerful driver for communicating both the plan or action that I will be doing, but also the promise or expectation that I will be delivering. There is more weight behind it and I find myself using it as a test.
Is the thing that I am signing up to do something I truly believe in doing? If the answer is no - that doesn’t necessarily mean that I am not signing up to do it. It just helps with my decision making process for understanding priority.
It sets an expectation for doing something and delivering - meaning accountability and credibility are at the forefront of the decision making process and following through.
Encouraging healthy communications
Another example of how I have changed my communication patterns was from a LinkedIn post I saw at random - wish I had tagged it - was around the way of both responding to life events and supporting those who have life events.
Not talking major life events here - small things like being a minute or two late to a conversation while helping a family member or - as is relevant to me lately - holding the little while mom gets his sister ready.
Transforming the natural response of “sorry about that” and the apology to a more regular norm of “I appreciate your patience” and placing less blame on yourself/family.
I’ve found this extends to other effective strategies in communicating. Someone reaches out to you to discuss a new product they offer or some other service that really isn’t relevant to you. I do my best to reply and communicate that there isn’t a good fit or that I am not the right audience - but sometimes that falls by the wayside with more important tasks.
I’ll follow up in emails in a similar manner - “Thank you for your patience” instead of “sorry for the late reply”.
Reinforcing Positive Self-talk
Maybe there is a better word here for that - but something that really resonates with me is finding ways to help people get away from negatively talking about themselves. I think we all joke sometimes about our capabilities - but we’re where we are for a reason. Talking negatively about yourself is a compounding activity that only further cements often incorrect perceptions.
Finding ways to help others here has been something I enjoy - both in the act of participation but also from the sidelines of others who care as well.
How we learn to communicate effectively really does go a long way. I still have a lot to learn myself (I tend to ramble) - but making the explicit attempt to course correct is my intent.