Another wellbeing topic - as I believe people need reminders on a regular basis. This one being important to me because it comes from a conversation with a friend.
Self Perception: How do you perceive yourself - here and now - as well as where you believe you can go.
Self deprecating comments can be fun jokes at the expense of oneself and do no harm when you know the truth behind them. But the other side of the coin is that imposter-syndrome would not be a thing if not for doubt that lives in the minds of others.
Self Help
Quick side-note - for anyone who actively seeks being a better person, you’ve likely perused youtube on various subjects to see various creators all talking about the same basics. Sometimes it is laughable, but what I do actually appreciate is that each person is discussing their own systems for making this work.
These are additional reminders with the intent (most of the time) to help people improve and grow - and that aligns with my value “Make one persons life a little better”.
Self Doubt
This was the driver for the conversation and it always triggers a reminder a few sources worth quoting from - one being Maxwell Maltz.
The man who conceives himself to be a “failure-type person” will find some way to fail, in spite of all his good intentions, even if opportunity is dumped in his lap.
The person who conceives himself to be a victim of injustice, one who “was meant to suffer”, will invariably find circumstances to verify his opinions.
The above from the book Psycho-Cybernetics - 1960
The Power
The quotes above are powerful enough for me that, when I hear someone speaking self-deprecating comments in a non-joke fashion, my heart hurts a little. Something within them holds parts or all of the statements to heart and that can haunt them.
It takes people reminding them where to focus their current ideals.
- Where you are now
- Where you want to go
Many times people are in a decent place - but maybe they feel stuck or stagnant. Nonetheless there are usually qualities that landed them there. Also as true is that growth-minded individuals will often not be happy with stagnation - rather they have visions of continuing to grow and move beyond their current responsibilities.
What next
The next step is often the hardest - as it is not easy to prescribe from the outside. What do you recommend they do next? You have to believe you can conquer the next step - and that next step has to be accomplishable otherwise they’ll be forever watching it on a pedestal.
But it’s as easy as making a decision and executing. Make the change small and continue to execute until it is a normal thought - then find the next thread to pull in compounding the ways you are improving the NOW and moving towards the NEXT.